Pishposh71's Blog

Day 483: Thank You!

Oh thank you thank you thank you for letting it only be a 24 hour bug. I was terrified it was going to be a 3 day deal that would ruin my entire weekend and all the birthday plans I have for our girlie girlie shopping day with my daughter.  I have secretly been looking forward to this time together for the last week.  Its fun to go off with her and shop.  I also know that the clock is ticking on this activity and in a few years I wont be a part of this anymore.

Our kids go everywhere with us, we have always been like that.  It’s not very often that we go without them.  In some ways I think that’s a good thing and in others I think it’s a bad thing.

Anyway, today was scale day and as we all know I am desperately fighting the scale to see 199 again.  My body has other plans though and intends to be a pain in the ass every step of the way on this.  So today the scale is 201.6 lbs. This is also after being sick yesterday so it may not be a true reading.  I did make sure that I drank yesterday, ginger ale and water all day long in hopes that I wouldn’t become dehydrated.  When I went to bed at 8pm last night I cheated and got on the scale and it said 200.2 lbs.  I had a chuckle at that.  Even when I’m sick that bloody scale won’t give me the satisfaction of seeing a 1 instead of a 2.  This is a big milestone for me.  It’s a mark of success that holds significance and these past few weeks have been a battle to defeat it.  It hasn’t pulled me down or made me depressed like it would have a year ago but rather I find it annoying and it just plain pisses me off.  Last year this would have made me depressed and think about junk food. This year it makes me want to go to the gym.  As the time passes the way you think changes and also improves for the better.  I am hoping that eventually I can get my family to make these changes too.

Thankful for feeling better and glad that I can get a workout in today plus pay for my years membership (thank you tax return) which is another positive step toward my final goal.

I have decided to be a little less demanding of the scale. ALmost 3 weeks ago I thought I would break that 200 mark and I am still fighting with it.  I would like to break it next week but I have accepted that it may take longer.  I understand that WILL happen because I can control that.  I also know that the WHEN is totally out of my hands and in control of this wretched body!!


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